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Rangaswamai’s Rules of Computer Usage
You will never have an extra blank disk.
If you do bring along a blank disk, you won’t need it.
If you don’t bring along a blank disk, it will be the only available
opportunity to obtain a copy of a hitherto unattainable and uniquely
appropriate program.
If someone else is watching while you are doing anything on the
computer, anything at all, it will screw up (that’s a technical term).
The percentage chances of screwing up increase in direct proportion to
the size of your audience.
No matter how simple it seems to you, your explanation will be more
than they want to know.
You will amaze yourself at how much you know.
You will amaze your mother at how much you know about computers.
You will always have one disk envelope too few. Or too many.
The only pieces of data you will ever lose are the ones you were going
to save just as soon as you finished typing a couple more lines.
The update of your program will use the keys for something entirely
different in this version than it did when you first learned it.
You will not understand it the first time you read it in the manual.
You will understand it better the next time you read the manual. For
no discernible reason.
When you are late for an interview and need a last minute copy of your
resume your printer will go down. It will always go down. It doesn’t
care. Nowhere in your repair manual will it ever tell you what you
really need to do, which is to turn the darn thing off and get
yourself a cup of coffee/tea.
You will never know what a user file is.
The price of anything you buy will stay the same until the actual
impact of your money on the bottom of the cash drawer, at which time
it will automatically re-list itself in next Thursday’s paper at 30%
less.
Staring at the screen for 97 continuous minutes will not necessarily
reveal to you the secret location of any colon that should have been
typed in as a semi. Or vice versa.
It will always seem like your friend got a better deal.
The maintenance engineer will always be busy.
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