A party of economists was climbing in the Alps . After several hours they became hopelessly lost. One of them studied the map for some time, turning it up and down, sighting on distant landmarks, consulting his compass, and finally the sun.
Finally he said, ‘ OK see that big mountain over there?’
’Yes’, answered the others eagerly.
’Well, according to the map, we’re standing on top of it.’ 

Q: How many Chicago School economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. If the light bulb needed changing the market would have already done it.

Q: How many mainstream economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assume the existence of ladder and one to change the bulb.

Q: How many conservative economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

Q: How many B-school doctoral students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: I’m writing my dissertation on that topic; I should have an answer for you in about 5 years.

Q; How many central bank economists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Just one — he holds the lightbulb and the whole earth revolves around him. 

Q: How many marxists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None - the bulb contains within it the seeds of its own revolution. 

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed a desire to become a "great" writer. When asked to define "great", this is what he said:
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, wail, howl in pain, desperation and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft writing error messages...

A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden.   
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." 
"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They’re naked, and so beautiful.  Clearly, they are French."  
"No way!  They have no clothes and no shelter," the Russian points out, "They have only an apple to eat, and are being told they live in a paradise. Obviously, they are Russian."

The Israeli army unit was crossing the desert and most of the men were on camels. 
Lt. Smith had a very stubborn camel, and finally it stopped dead in its tracks and refused to move another step. 
The rest of the unit moved on, leaving Smith along with his mulish camel. 
Smith sat on the camel for three hours.  He kicked the camel.  He pleaded with it and shouted curses, but the camel would not budge.
He dismounted and was standing disconsolately at its side when a woman soldier drove up in a jeep and asked him if he needed help.
Lt. Smith explained to her that the camel wouldn’t budge.
"Oh, I can fix that," she said jumping out of her jeep.  She reached down and put her hand under the camel’s belly.  The camel jumped up and down, and then took off at the rate of half a mile a minute.
Lt. Smith was astounded.  "What did you do that, lady?  What’s the trick ?"
"Its simple, Lieutenant.  I just tickled his balls."
"Well, lady, you’d better tickle mine too, because I’ve got to catch that camel!"

Chivalry has changed from the days of Sir Walter Raleigh, but contrary to rumour, it hasn’t died out altogether: a man will still lay his coat at the feet of a pretty girl; the difference is that nowadays it’s intended to keep her back from getting dirty.
"What’s that drink you’re mixing?" asked Shekhar, to the bartender at one of the pubs.
"I call this a rum dandy," said the barkeep.
"What’s in it?" asked a curious Shekhar.
"Sugar, milk and rum," replied the bartender.
"Is it good?" asked the stranger.
"Sure," said the bartender. "The sugar gives you pep, the milk gives you energy."
"And the rum?" asked Shekhar.
"Ideas about what to do with all that pep and energy."

A father and son went fishing one day.  After a couple hours out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him.
He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"
The father thought for a moment, then replied, "I Don’t rightly know, son."
The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to his father, "How do fish breath underwater?"
Once again the father replied, "Don’t rightly know, son."
A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?"
Again, the father replied. "Don’t rightly know, son."
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?"
"Of course not son.  If you don’t ask questions,... you’ll never learn anything!"